Feasting
.. the blatantly obvious trick to growth.
I have a tradition that would have been useful to send you yesterday, but I was busy executing said tradition and I didn't do that.
It's a terrible way to express my thanks to you, my dear loyal reader, my dear friend, <meta_inject_first_name_beep_boop>.
Any time that you're going to consume an inordinate amount of calories, create a full body demand for muscle growth before you ingest the mass.
You will be eating more calories than you can possibly burn.
Thus, you should try to grow more muscle than you can possibly grow.
You're going to get fatter no matter what.
Be fatter and stronger.
I accomplish this by doing a full-body, multi-joint workout... which doesn't need to take more than 30 minutes.
For example:
3 x 10 reps Bench Press
(substitute with 3 sets of push-ups to failure).
This creates the demand for growth in all of the "pushing" muscles in your upper body.
(Pushups also build your core.)
(Bench press builds your back if you drive your heels into the ground).
3 x 10 Reps Bent over Rows
(or find something heavy and 'row' it.)
This hits the "pulling" muscles, and since you're bent over, you also strengthen your lower back and hamstrings.
Don't underestimate the amount of bicep and tricep involvement in those two movements... you don't have to add in extra work on your arms just to point out where the clouds are.
3 x 8 Reps Squats
(or substitute with 3 sets of jumping squats to failure)
Squats build your legs, butt, and core. This will make your largest muscles hungry for poultry
3 x 8 Reps Deadlifts
(or substitute with 3 sets of 'Wheel Pose' to failure, and I wish mercy upon you.)
Deadlifts build your back primarily, but also actuate your abdominal muscles more than any other exercise.
...or so I read in a theoretically fact based meme.
Deadlifts build your whole body. It's arguably the most time-efficient and important muscle building exercise.
NEXT... DO A SPRINT.
even just one is fine.
Nothing makes humans more 'out of breath' than full-bore sprinting. It's the most efficient way to burn through all of your available oxygen, and subsequently tap deep into your glycogen stores.
Your feast will be required to replenish these stores.
And this is how sprinters look:
Train like the athlete that you want to look like...
Unless you're like me...
(I haven't achieved a full speed spring since probably 2006.)
In which case, don't sprint.
Just don't. Be unlike Nike.
If you want to work into it, start by jogging for a few minutes. Then stop.
On another day, jog for a few minutes and then slowly pick up speed until you're completely winded. Try to recover your breath while jogging.
Just one interval.
If your joints and body haven't rejected this madness, you can experiment next time out with a full speed sprint...
If work your way up to even just a single 30 second sprint, you will generate a spike in your Growth Hormone levels.
This is the perfect hormonal response to go with your full body workout.
You have now signaled for your entire body to grow... all you need to do is provide the feast.
This is how I try to minimize the blubbery damage of the holiday season, and become a more powerful human being.
I hope it works for you .
Happy feasting.
-Trav
P.S. In case I've never told you... I am thankful to have you reading this madness.
It's because of you that I have the best job in the world... and without you I'd just be here writing to myself.
Which I guess would be a diary.
And I find diaries to be an intolerable hobby.
What kind of person consistently and honestly expresses the things that he or she is feeling?!
Pffft... nonsense I say!
This is better. So I am grateful to have you reading this newsletter.
Now I beg you... don't respond to this. Just accept my humble praises, and go about your day knowing that you have my appreciation.
I beg of you...
Also, don't be that guy who responds anyhow and says, "Gahahaha I know you said not to respond but..."
This will be my face as I read your clever jest:
Now have a fantastic day, I command you.
-Trav